(Source: heathermorris, via feyminism)

(Source: , via feyminism)

Perfection is my middle name. Unclaimed Perfection Baby Boy.

-Tracy Jordon

(Source: kayliehooper)

"Hey, nerds! Guess who has two thumbs, speaks limited French, and hasn’t cried once today. (points to herself with both thumbs) This moi!"
– LIZ LEMON

(Source: s-eon)

boxofficeconfessions:

I feel pretty green about it.

boxofficeconfessions:

I feel pretty green about it.

(Source: aliblahblahb)

"I was going to go to take a class on cooking for one but the teacher killed himself…"

(Source: lonely-hunters)

"Relationships are like sharks, Liz. If you’re not left with several bite marks after intercourse, then something’s wrong."
– Jenna Maroney, 30 Rock

(Source: suburbansteel)

"JACK: You want a confession? Let’s get this done, so I can go eat. [PRIEST looks on in bewilderment bordering on panic.] I am divorced. I take the Lord’s name in vain often, and with great relish. I hit my mother with a car — possibly by accident.
[Time gap.]
JACK: I almost let him choke to death right there on the football field. [PRIEST is shocked.] I looked the other way when my wig-based parent company turned a bunch of children orange. I once claimed “I am God” — during a deposition.
[Time gap.]
JACK: And I may have sodomized our former vice president while under the influence of some weapons-grade narcotics. Ahhh! It feels good to say that out loud. Actually, that one was weighing on me."

30 Rock

Season Three

(via shoo-nigel-deactivated20121203)

(Source: facethedawn)